Tired but Trying to Push Through

When I decided to write a blog a few years ago, all I wanted to write about was my journey to the Tough Mudder.  When I completed that, I decided to create a new blog to write about whatever I wanted.

With my blog, I don’t want to be scared to talk about what ever is on my mind with no apologies.  I just want to write about what is in my head and share it with whom ever reads it.  I make no apologies for what I write because what I write comes from me.

As some of you have read, I have been very busy.  I’m trying my best to be the best husband I can be (which I do not feel I am doing a very good job), be the kind of Dad that is not too busy for my son and be around and have fun with him, teach my students, coach my football players (thankfully football season is over), complete grad school (just 2 more weeks), and anything else that comes on my plate.

I AM JUST PLAIN TIRED!

I would like to just sleep and rest but I really don’t know how.  Even when I am sick (except with the flu, which i am on the verge of my death-bed), I can’t just sit still and do nothing.  I feel like it is almost impossible because I can’t shut my brain off to relax and not think (damn my ADHD).

With all of this going on, it has truly effected me though, and in not alway the positive way.  One positive is that I am never bored, something is always going on.  But mainly it has effected my passion!  I am a very passionate person who attempts to give 100+% in all that I do, but I am having a hard time doing this and in no other place is this more evident than in my marriage.

I love my wife more than I can even say, I have loved her since I met her.  But as the years have gone on, I have not given her the attention that I once did and it is no ones fault than my own.  I can tell her everyday that my love for her has not changed, but I no longer show her.  I make all of these plans of things I would like to do for her, but I let my schedule and exhaustion interfere with showing my wife my true feelings for her.  (Guys, never stop making them feel like a princess).  I used to show my wife how much I loved her and what she meant to me, but I let life and myself get in the way.  The sad thing is that I want to change it but I really don’t know how to.

I know that through my exhaustion and life, I need to make sure that not only do I push through, but I overcome the obstacles to reach those that mean the most to me.  Being tired cannot be an excuse to why put thing off to tomorrow because when will tomorrow become today?

Life is hard and it will wear you down, but you must keep moving forward or life will run you over.  I may be tired and barely have enough energy to move throughout the day, but I chose to keep moving forward towards my goals and love ones.

No matter what your struggle is, never stop fighting because the reward will have been worth the fight.

Until next time….

Lets try this again……

After much time from my blog, I am going to try writing it again.  I miss writing, even if there really isn’t a topic that I am going to cover.

Today is going to be about why I have been gone for so long.

Something had to give in my life because my plate was too FULL!!!!  If it was a box, it would be filled to the brim with stuff flowing out from the sides.  I was exhausted.

I started a new job in August, I still am an educator but I moved from teaching elementary special education and moved to teaching 6th-8th grade special education mathematics, the type of teaching position that started my career.  I am so happy to be teaching math once again, I’m a nerd and just love teaching math.  The school I am at, this is a first for me, is on the richer side of town.  I have spent most of my career teaching in title 1 (or almost title 1) schools.

In addition to my new teaching position, I have come out of coaching “retirement’ and began coaching football once again.  I had forgotten how many hours were involved in coaching but it was not nearly the amount of hours I used to spend on football before.  I would have never thought about coaching again if my son (the stinker) and my wife were not supportive of it.  I love football, okay sports in general, but I do love coaching because I feel like I have the knowledge to help mold young athletes into better players, and most importantly better people.

I know some people would be overwhelmed by that, but there is more.  I am still pursuing my masters degree in educational leadership.  I am very happy to say that the pursuit of my graduate degree is almost complete with graduation happening on December 13, 2014, so I am just a few weeks shy of completion (which I am very excited about).

So needless to say, I am ready for a break.  But that is not all that is going on because I haven’t even talked about the top people in my life that are my number 1 priority (and they have been keeping me busy).

Let’s start of with my wonderful three year old son, a.k.a. the stinker.  I love being a dad and he keeps me on my toes, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.  He is going to preschool 3 days a week and he has lots of fun going.  He has also developed a love of sports (I think that came from me), he is currently playing soccer (yes, there are leagues for 3 year olds) that I am the head coach of; more coaching for me.  I am simply amazed by him everyday (says almost every parent), he is growing too quickly and is so smart.  He wants to learn, but is quick to pick up everything that is going on around him (good and bad).

Next on to my beautiful wife, the love of my life (no I am not in trouble).  She has been very busy, which makes our house extremely busy.  At this time, she is working on completing a book to have published.  She had already written it once but decided to change the format of the story from 1st person to 3rd person, which i think helps they story a lot.  I already loved her story and knew it would get published, but now with the change, it is so much better!  With her so focused on her writing and getting her book published, we as a family decided for her to leave her job at our son’s pre-school to focus on it 100%.

Life has been going for my family and I but I wouldn’t have it any other way, other wise my life would be very boring.  So my message today is to be thankful for your life and be thankful for all that is going on because there is a plan for you already happening (even though you  may not know it).

Until next time…….